Bill Would Eliminate Parallel Parking On State Driving Tests

Remember the nerve wracking moment you had to prove your parallel parking mettle on the driving road test? Yeah, your kids may not have to worry about that.

House Bill 4576, now under consideration in the Michigan House of Representatives, would modify the driving skills test to eliminate the parallel parking portion.

In part, the bill reads:

(11) THE SECRETARY OF STATE SHALL NOT REQUIRE AN APPLICANT FOR 9 AN OPERATOR'S LICENSE TO DEMONSTRATE PROFICIENCY IN THE SKILL OF 10 PARALLEL PARKING TO SUCCESSFULLY COMPLETE A DRIVING SKILLS TEST

What!? I worked my butt off to learn to be the best parallel parker in the modern free world.* And now, because new cars parallel park for you, it's not a skill worth learning?

The person who proposed the bill, Sarah Lightner, says it's an 'outdated practice' and that parallel parking proficiency isn't ideal in today's world. "If you do have a parallel parking issue, if you can't fit, drive around the block."

Sure, and just like those kids who can't drive a stick shift, this is going to lead to scenarios that threaten the sanctity of mankind, or something!

I'm not going to get offended here, but what's the crime of at least knowing that skill to use in a pinch? What brought this whole thing on?

Apparently, too many Michiganders were forking over their $50 fee to take the test and then flunking the parallel parking portion.

Dave Muma, owner of Century Driving School told WZZM:

"The state of Michigan with the road tests is looking for really four components: Do you know how far your front end sticks out? Do you know how far your back end sticks out? Do you know how to back up to your right side? Do you know how to back up to your left side? In these exercises and how they're being asked to be performed, these are the easiest ways to do that."

Oh, so only the EASY stuff should be on the test. No wonder we suck as drivers.

* -- Jojo's parallel parking skills have not been verified by an independent source.