Fun With Writing…Really BAD Writing

One of our daughters, Alissa Vidro, married to Matt,is an English teacher at Allendale High School.  She love her work and her students.  She loves being in the classroom, helping them grow as they become adults and prepare them for the real world.

They study literature, and writing, and I'm hoping improve their writing abilities a bit better than these students.

I love real stories like one sent to me by Ball State University.  Let me set the stage.  It seems that some High School students were assigned to write a story and to incorporate analogies in their stories.  Get ready for some real "funny ones." Here are some of the results that you can't make up.  These actually are REALLY BAD ANALOGIES from real students.

1. He was as tall as a 6'3"tree.
2. Her face was a perfect oval, like a circle that had its two sides gently compressed by a Thigh Master.
3. John and Mary had never met.  There were like two hummingbirds who had also never met.
4. She had a deep, throaty, genuine laugh, like that sound a dog makes just before it throws up.
5. He was as lame as a duck.  Not the metaphorical lame duck, either, but a real duck that was actually lame.  Maybe from stepping on a land mine or something.
6. Her vocabulary was as bad as, like, whatever.

Don't you love it? Hysterical.  I'm still laughing.  Good luck to my daughter.  I just know HER students will turn out to be better writers!